Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I puked a lego.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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