u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
