i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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