Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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