the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize