I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize