if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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