Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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