You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize