in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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