Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
