I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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