she looked like the bat from fern gully.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
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