pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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