apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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