birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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