You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
