what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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