So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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