you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
