i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize
