Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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