The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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