she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
