..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
