So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize