Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize