god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize