Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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