Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
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