please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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