We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
