I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize