where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
