Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Tornado booty call.. dedication
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
