I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
