omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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