It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
