Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
