Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize