dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
