we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm sobbing to NWA
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
