thus making me awesome and them whores
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
