Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
