Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Well I just put wine in my tea
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
