that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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