I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
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