Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
These tits shall not be calmed
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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