Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
