yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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